You're not the problem, your trauma is

 

Oftentimes there's more to people's behaviour than we think... Avoiding conflict to keep the peace is a trauma response. Based on my personal experiences below.

• Hypersensitive - anything that triggers a painful past makes me wanna go back in time and correct things. I could have done better, but when you are young and naïve. It's difficult to avoid mistakes along the way. 
• Refuses help - I left the first state I lived in, in Brisbane QLD. I pursue a decision on my own even if it means a struggle. I always pushed myself to prove to people even with family, that I can look after myself and my daughter without their help. I can create our own future, regardless of the path we are heading. The road I've been through is not easy as what other people think just cause of what they see on my social media account. I am stubborn to seek help when it comes to my personal life if it reaches to a point that I struggle, I don't reach out to my family. I do things my way. 
• Unmotivated - When have I ever not feel depressed? I am when the day's and moment calls for it. We all do in some way, when we just don't feel that booster of confidence and motivation that we needed. Whenever I feel weathered, I tend to back down a little bit and give myself a space out of the spotlight. Being unmotivated is not going to get you wherever you needed to go and be with the people that truly deserves your time. 
• Avoidant - I cry, oh yes I do cry, who doesn't right. Issues at work, family, myself, partner or just simply hating my existence. That's how I managed, I let it all out. Sometimes I try NOT to bring my personal issues to work. I waited like end of Friday and just let myself lose, feel down and cry. But when a situation is impossible, it's not hard not to show how destructed I am. 
• Reactive - I realize now that I can be a fool when I listen too much on how I feel about a current situation. My borderline personality plays a major role in the way I responds to events in my life. When it become too much, it can get difficult to manage my emotions.

- iannmarie